THE CATEGORY
CABINET

The argument that American ambition requires a rival receives the strongest support.

The deliberately extreme take argued that sacrificing the bus would have protected Los Angeles from catastrophic damage.

The strongest take argues for simple relationship stories instead of elaborate premises.

The hosts endorse reordering the film so its coolest heist closes the story.

The proposed trilogy reorder receives a clear endorsement as a stronger franchise path.

Sean argues the movie should have been an even bigger deal because both child stars were coming off performances he believes merited Oscar wins.

They land on Robert Evans as the funniest alternate-world fit, with Byron Mayo also mentioned.

They endorse the contrarian take that Peyton would actually make a stronger wife than Claire.

They argue that Allie is such a terrible roommate that Hedy looks preferable by comparison, even while acknowledging Hedy is unstable.

Kyle’s hot take is that society should return to the old double-cheek-kiss greeting.

Two hosts say the material doesn’t bother them here because the performance is so strong and the satire is doing real work.

Bill argues for Ghostbusters as the top SNL-adjacent movie, while the others counter with other franchise and casting thoughts.

Bill makes the provocative case that Crisp is the sympathetic figure and Arnold is the one behaving badly.

The hosts float several hot takes, but the category never settles on a single definitive winner.

They argue the film would hit harder if Dark Side were saved for later in the story rather than opened with it.

Sean’s hot take is that the movie works as an Oz allegory with Dudley as the wizard and the main cops mapped onto the archetypes.

They trade a few spicier Bond opinions, with one prominent take being that Campbell would have dramatically elevated Brosnan’s run.

Bill argues Carrey's performance was Oscar-worthy, and Zach follows with a separate hot take about Marino's cameo ranking.

Mallory's hottest take is that the scheme would have been simpler and better if Sandra Van Ryan had just been killed outright.

One host says Zodiac is the greatest American crime film, while another goes further and calls Zodiac the greatest serial killer of all time.

They revisit the earlier hot take that the stronger version of the movie would have had Sonny lose the race.

Rob’s hottest take is that Nirvana’s 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' is overrated and actually bad, and the room reacts strongly to it.

Bill argues Hawn had a uniquely adorable screen presence and would have thrived in later rom-coms.

Bill makes the case that Lisa is obnoxious and inconsistent, and Kyle agrees with the criticism.

Sean’s hot take is that The Untouchables is De Palma’s most overrated major film, and the others respond that they understand the critique even if they like it more.

Bill’s hot take was that Carrey is excellent here and that Hanks would have been a viable alternate lead.

Bill argued Morrow was star-level, while Brian’s bigger alternate-history take was that the movie would have won the Oscars if released a year later.

Joanna says this is Redford's last great movie, and Kyle follows with a very hot comparison of Redford's slow walk to Mission: Impossible feats.

CR's hottest take was that Redford should have made more solo survival movies like this one.

Bill argues that Lorna Patterson should have broken out more after this movie.

The hottest take is that Roy repeatedly folds when the moment is biggest.

CR argued that Brolin's career after this film is the strongest of the three leads by a wide margin.

Bill states a deliberately hot take that Rollerball works better than The Parallax View as a paranoid thriller.

Bill's hot take is that the movie blows it with the final Dick Jones puppet effect.

Bill's hot take was that Ledger belongs near the very top of 21st-century male acting performances.

Bill argues that Scorsese’s 1980s are better than his 1990s, while also placing After Hours in his top three Scorsese films.

They debate the idea that this is the best Die Hard film, and one additional hot take argues the Simon Says premise was underused.

They argue Seagal’s weird charisma and physicality could have made him a Tony Soprano-type star.

Van's big take is that the movie plays like a horror movie if you think through the metaphysics, and the others add their own hot takes.

One host argues the finale's musical exchange becomes awkward once it expands beyond the initial five-note communication.

Craig's take is that a precog-powered gambling operation would be more useful than the system they have in the movie.

Joanna argues Amanda should choose herself instead of immediately pairing off with Preston.

Kyle argues that Shue’s kissing scenes across multiple movies make her the all-time champion in that category.

Bill's strongest hot take is that Will is no different from the Harvard-bar blowhard he mocks.

The hosts trade several hot takes, and the clearest one is that Cruise’s pre-braces teeth looked better than his current ones.

Bill’s Philly take becomes the lead hot take, with Rocky/Apollo as a second spicy idea discussed alongside it.

Bill's hottest take is that Wayne's World is the most quotable movie ever made.

Bill argues cocaine is underrated as a creative and cultural force and credits it with making this kind of movie possible.

They debate the moral cost of rooting for the reunion, noting that Jesse and Celine are both damaging their existing relationships.

They like the idea of soliciting reader hot takes on movies they've just covered, but no winner is chosen.

Bill and Mallory settle on Billy Bob Thornton as the hotter alternate outcome for the coach role in the series.

Bill argues Harry and Marv are in a romantic relationship, while Kyle counters with a take that Kevin wants to be away from his family.

Both hosts argue the premise had the ingredients to be a much bigger franchise-style action comedy if shaped differently.

Kyle's horror-movie reading of the film is treated as the standout hot take.

One host's strongest hot take is that movies should be allowed to use unsimulated sex if the actors want it.

They mostly discussed whether Hopkins's best work was here or in The Father, with the latter framed as the hot take.

Bill says Zelda Rubinstein might be perfectly cast but still may not actually be a good actor.

Chris's hottest take is that The Curse of the Blair Witch is nearly better than the feature itself.

One take argues that Hawk is the real villain because he abandoned his family, seems like a drug dealer, and manipulates his way back into custody.

Shea's hot take was that Leguizamo was so good here that he should have had a much larger role across more of the movie.

The idea was that the movie’s chalkboard pitch clearly prefigured the “always be closing” speech in Glengarry.

Bill's hottest take is that Rudy's brother Frank was right and Rudy would have had a better life if he had not chased the football dream.

Danny Kelly pitches Justin Long as a Matthew Broderick-type star rather than a Luke Wilson comparison.

One of the hottest takes was that Butch is morally compromised because he leaves his corner men to be tortured.

They argued that this film's reveal mechanics are stronger than the more famous twist movies that followed.

The hosts float several takes, but no single hottest take gets formal agreement.

Bill argued that The Naked Gun is the funniest eighties comedy start to finish, and Kyle agreed it belongs in the finale with Caddyshack and Vacation.

They argue the movie helped cement the Yankees as the bad guys in sports culture.

Bill’s Burt Reynolds driving take carries the discussion and no stronger alternative is chosen.

They trade larger interpretive takes, with the family/coming-of-age reading landing as the main one discussed in that stretch.

They argue the movie earns its crude dialogue because it still gives Suzanne some real dimension and balance.

One host argues the finale would work better if Ned abandoned the striptease and turned the climax into a conventional sports-movie win.

Mallory argues that Spicoli is smarter than he appears, while the others riff on Ron Johnson.

One host argues hoverboards should exist now, and another floats the big alternate-universe reveal that Marty is Biff’s son.

They call the premise one of the great missed opportunities for a video game adaptation.

They debated Cruise vs. Hanks and ultimately settled on Hanks as the better casting choice for the movie.

One host floats a Gavin conspiracy theory, while another pushes for a darker dog-ending take, so no single winner fully lands.

They explicitly land on the take that the wife bears half the blame for the tragedy.

Bill argues the film plays like a prequel to Eyes Wide Shut, and Chris responds with a strong Cruise-rankings take of his own.

CR's argument that Dalton gentrifies the Double Deuce gets the warmest reception.

Van argues that Worm is effectively orchestrating Mike's downfall, while Bill counters with a separate ESPN-centered take.

Van’s outrageous Apollo/Rocky relationship theory wins the round of hottest takes.

Chris Ryan argues the movie works best if read as a Jesus parable, with Forrest as a Christ figure.

The sharpest takeaway is that Chuck Nichols left the loose end of Sykes open for too long.

One host argues the garbage-bag weight-loss gag is unnecessary city mythology, while the others offer different hot takes about casting and Randy.

They intentionally choose an outlandish casting hot take and land on Seagal as the lead in The Fugitive.

One host argues that the movie works partly because Chevy Chase convincingly sells Clark’s crisis and frustration.

Chris's take that Lynette is appealing and well-drawn is presented as the hot take, while Bill offers a separate Gere-kissing take.

Bill argues the Omen IP is best suited to a multi-season Damien series rather than a film franchise.

One host makes the argument that Russo’s 1990s run beats Roberts and several other actresses’ catalogs.

Chris argues that Harriet and Charlie’s connection is mostly montage energy, and Bill pushes the idea that Charlie is an almost indefensible character.

They endorse a girls'-boarding-school sequel as the hottest take and say they would have watched it.

Bill’s hot take is that the one-week trip is too short for the level of crisis, while Amanda’s stronger hot take is that the film damaged Cameron Diaz’s career trajectory.

Van argues that Clark was driven to stray because of his wife’s repeated rejections, and the others let the take stand.

The room treats the Jimmy Butler comparison as the standout hot take.

One host’s hottest take was that Keanu Reeves is the greatest bad actor of the last 35 years.

Bill’s take is that movies like this may have encouraged people to defend themselves in court, but the room doesn’t elevate it into a consensus pick.

Sean’s main hot take is that Marty’s legal strategy and motives do not fully make sense.

They explicitly argue that a River Phoenix Young Indiana Jones prequel would have been the better franchise move.

The hosts offer competing hottest takes, including an insider-trading angle and a debate over whether Trading Places is a Christmas movie.

Bill's hot take is that a sequel should be made, following Carl in a later chapter of his life.

Van's most provocative take is that Marvel never returned to casting a light-skinned Black leading man after this film.

They argue the story would work better if it had a murder, murder attempt, or other darker turn.

Bill's take that De Niro is the greatest maniac actor in movie history is the one the room endorses.

They argue that Mottola’s work deserved a bigger big-screen career than he ultimately got.

Bill gives the award to his take that JC's dad is an atrocious parent for tolerating Mick's presence at all.

They mostly joke that the whole movie is itself a hottest take, so no single take is awarded.

One host argues Rosie O'Donnell is the film's key ingredient and the others largely accept the praise.

Bill and Chris settle on being open to remakes of foreign films when the new version adds a worthwhile spin.

Kyle's hottest take is that Rooker's girlfriend wanted to die and staged her fall as a suicide.

Bill argues that this is Will Smith's best acting performance, even over his Oscar-winning role in King Richard.

One host argues that, with the key testimony struck, the legal outcome should have gone against Frank.

Bill said outright that this might be his favorite Denzel Washington movie, and Chris agreed it was hot.

They argue Candy's place in comedy history is slightly underrated compared with Belushi and Farley.

Bill forcefully argues that Turner was snubbed from the Best Actress race.

Mallory's main take is that a movie about a gigolo should have more sex on screen, and she also argues Lauren Hutton is miscast.

Bill frames his hottest take as Bart the Bear being undervalued as a movie performer.

One host says the cross-joint sequence is boring and can be lived without, while another says the trailer made the movie seem better than it is.

Juliet's formal hot take is that female acapella is the least entertaining and fun category in the film's world.

Bill and Brian both back the idea that this movie is the stronger rewatch than The Big Short.

They trade multiple contrarian takes about the film, but never clearly crown one as the room’s winner.

Sean's main hot take is that Ed Burns is excellent and should have had a bigger mainstream career, while Bill floats a Best Picture challenge.

Shay argues Tango and Cash ranks second only to Beverly Hills Cop among 1980s buddy-cop movies.

One host's hot take is that Karen Rossi irresponsibly leaves a blind man in a shed with a teenager over Thanksgiving.

Amanda offers the spicier take that Sandy looked better before the leather-and-perm transformation, prompting the room to react strongly.

Juliet’s hot take was that the cowards scene is less impactful than its reputation because it is too brief and rushed.

Juliet argued that the movie needs the scene where Cindy’s boyfriend calls her a prostitute.

Chris advances the idea that Daniel’s relationship with Henry may be more than fraternal, and the others also offer a separate hot take about the movie’s standing versus No Country for Old Men.

One host's hottest take is that Above the Rim is the best basketball movie ever, while another offers a Montrose spinoff idea.

Craig says the party ultimately paid off for Thomas, and Bill’s hotter take is that the franchise should have continued in new forms.

One take argues Ness mishandled the witness protection setup, while the other claims Costner's 1987 was his peak movie year.

Bill floats a provocative read that Keating was negligent enough to share blame for Neil's death, and the others push back while discussing it.